FEEDBACK OF ROUGH CUT

EDITING

"The cuts were very good. The flashes of the girl in between all the pictures worked well. The length of the shot showing photos went on a bit long."

"Like the jaded editing between Leanna and the pictures."

"Shots are well put together."

"Really good sense of narrative."

"Spinning of the bottle is very good editing."

CAMERAWORK

"High angle shot of Leanna on floor was good, showed objectification well. "

"Good pictures make it scary"

"Move into photo; blur. sense of insecurity/fear."

"Nice pan around pictures"

"Close up gives tense feelings"

"Very good"

SOUND

"Very tranquil but creepy at the same time. "

":)"

"Leaves you on edge"

"Soft, contrapuntal"

Mise en scene

"Leanna looked very scared/mean. I liked it!"

"The use of the bottle is very effective- and the camera"

CONVENTIONS

"Vulnerable female character. Domineering/ threatening stalking character."

"Dark contrast"

"Creepy music"

Final Idea.

Narrating: (to the police, gets arrested at the end of film)

Flashback:
1) Room: photos of Leanna, cups with lipstick, locks of hair.
The narrating comes in with a black screen. "I was watching her in a coffee shop" -close up of coffee cup with lipstick on it.
"I worked at the hairdressers" - close up to a lock of hair.
"I've never seen anyone as beautiful as her before" -close up to picture of her.

2) Hear footsteps coming into the room. See his lower leg/feet.Door slams. Image of calender, each day has a photo of Leanna, apart from this day (didn't get to see her- angry). Loud music comes on (made from garage band, out onto CD player in scene). Slams down a beer bottle on a table, spins it, full image of room.

END.